Surprisingly the internet is littered with information on the pros and cons of being a work spouse. Honestly if you think about it, the practice is kind of a gray area that can easily go dark if handled the wrong way, BUT life as a work wife can be amazing, when done right of course.
Deep down no man or woman wants to know their partner is enjoying the perks of being a work spouse, but you best believe me when I say, such a situation might be just what you need for a balanced life. It might even be best to tell your partner who that person is. Tread with caution on that last bit though. You should know the type of person you are with and what they are able to handle.
Happy wife, happy life right?
I love the way the Urban Dictionary defines 'Work Wife'. It says "A work wife is a substitute for your wife while you are at work, providing companionship and support, but without the emotional and sexual elements."
Yes, so while we can all agree that the sexual element should be a no no; being a work wife without the emotional elements is kind of a snooze. That's actually the fun part. Its like riding an emotional roller coaster but in a good way. Yes there are some down moments but you're pretty much happy most of the time. If you have the right "work husband", they will ensure that the delicate balance between personal and work life is maintained.
So what are the perks of being a work wife?
1. The arguments are never too deep
Fighting with your work husband is like faking a cry when you were a child so you could get ice cream.
There is no real beef, just gimmicks about the silliest stuff, like you replacing him as work husband because you allowed another guy to carry your bags up the stairs more than once.
There will be times when a squabble gets a little bit heated and you decide to unplug for a day or two so he can learn his lesson. Those days of quiet malice are the worst. During those moments it feels like a real marriage with problems and who got time for that. Its always fun to watch them try and get your attention by doing what I call a 'temperature check'. If you're still heated they know its gonna be another rain check on that lunch date.
Okkk its not an actual date, like hey you're my type let's go the whole nine yards and get married and have some kids. Its strictly platonic. When you go for lunch with your other coworkers you don't call it a date right?
Speaking of type, your work husband might be your type in some way. Your personalities go well together and its what makes the dynamic duo work.
Unlike in 'real life'; arguments in this realm don't last that long. What would be the point anyway? You would only be making your work life miserable and losing precious time. There are only 8 hours in a typical work day and once you're home, you spend most of the time sleeping anyway, so why not be happy during prime time.
2. Life at work is more cheerful
Having worked in the corporate world for many years, I have found the workplace to be a more cheerful environment when there are several "work marriages" around. Again, not like real ones. Who wants to work with their actual spouse anyway? To then go home and discuss the same crap over dinner.
Ok back to work marriages (the fake ones). There are various degrees to these work marriages though and some are too hot to handle. Some teeter on the edge of being a full blown affair along with the accompanying baggage. The rest of us are just having innocent fun which frankly, leads to a more pleasing work environment and better work outputs.
Its nice to see work wives that are in healthy relationships where they share the joys of each other's company to the overall benefit of their departments and hopefully as an extension to their home lives.
It is rather entertaining too, to see some work spouses struggle to hide their relationship. I guess those types are doing the naughty but lets not judge right? I have also seen some odd pairings and I'm telling you, its no regular checklist that is used in selecting a work spouse.
Being a work wife is a privilege. The whole selection process is organic and mutually beneficial. I would call it a match made in heaven but that would be pushing it. A good and healthy work marriage might even be acknowledged and accepted by your peers. This is when you know you have it good. Yeah it sounds weird but it happens.
Being a work wife adds a little pep in your step. You feel like you can take on a huge pile of files and then some. Its like being on a permanent high. Say no to drugs by the way.
Now on a day when your work husband is absent its another matter. Somehow even though the sun may be shining outside, its just grim and gloom on the inside of your cubicle walls. A lethargic feeling comes over you and you might as well just pick up your bag and leave for the day.
One golden rule in a work marriage is to let your work spouse know when you will not be in. Its too painful to sit there hoping they show up. If you work a 9 to 5, you know its a wrap when it hits 11am and you don't see them BUT its awesome when they told you they won't be in and then they show up. At that moment you can hear the angels singing. Day made.
Weekends and holidays can suck if you don't have a healthy personal life. So get your situation right at home before embarking on a work marriage.
Now let me tell you, there are no Monday blues when you got a good thing going. You are out of that bed, in your clothes and out that door in no time. Well sometimes.
Been on a vacation or a long stay away from work? Nothing beats the awe struck reaction from your work husband when you return. It feels really good to be missed and if you're not missed, you've been replaced honey.
Now there are things far worse than missing your work spouse over the holidays and that is if they change jobs. Not like a promotion, but a whole other job in a new location.
The whole purpose of a 'work marriage' is to be in the same location enduring the same work hardships and sharing in the same office jokes.
The office becomes a dull and dreary place when your work spouse leaves. You are then left to pick up the pieces and find a replacement and the hunt for a replacement sucks, if you're stuck with the same team. Only new blood can revive your beating heart.
3. You have real motivation to arrive early and leave late
This behaviour is a boss's dream. How rewarding is it when the staff chooses to work early and stay late? No wonder some of these work marriages are openly accepted by management.
When you have the best work spouse, a mere 8 hours won't do. There is too much to say and do while juggling reports and attending meetings. Meetings are the best by the way. I'll tell you about that in another post.
The hours seem to fly when you're having fun right? So when the clock hits 5pm there is no way you can just up and leave. A little quality time must be spent.
To ensure productivity is at its highest level, this extra quality time is usually spent while completing a task. I've finished off reports that would not have been done otherwise.
While this kind of thing is fun, remember the balance; especially you ladies who need to rush home to cook dinner and nurture your children. Family first right?
4. You are highly motivated to look your best.
Remember when I said your emotions have to be involved a bit for this to be fun. Well your work spouse is not made of stone and feelings might beget feelings...but don't worry its harmless. If that's not the case you better get a grip on things fast.
Why would he be your work husband anyway if he got nothing going for him? This work marriage thing is a step above the 'friend zone' but with friend zone qualities. You get me?
When you are a work wife, you find yourself making a little more effort when getting dressed for work. It is an occasion after all. That walk into the department must be mean, your smile on point and your scent game on 100.
Everywhere you look, colours are brighter, things are shinier and you just want to put your best foot forward. That's what being happy is all about. If you have that kind of motivation on all fronts (home and work), hats off to you.
Looking good for your work husband is all innocent flirting in my book. The strings of sexual tension will not burst because you're looking fine as hell. Plus you have to represent. Nobody wants some tired ass looking work wife anyway.
You know you're on point by the look on their face. Being a work wife means you are close to being wifey but without all that stuff wifey got to do, like cook, clean, have sex etc. So it makes sense that he is attracted but doing his best to be a good boy and play his role in an exemplary manner.
He got eyes though and getting a compliment from your work husband is expected, not a crime.
If you only hear praises at home, you might as well be looking in the mirror. There would be no need for catwalks and runways, if not to turn heads in the streets. Furthermore, work can be such a drag at times, so dressing well does take the edge off.
5. It can prove to be cost effective
When you are a work wife you are able to save a buck or two if you are with a generous work spouse. You can save pennies on every dollar in the following ways:
Your work spouse buys you lunch on the daily. Whether you are giving him your money and placing your order or just placing an order on his dime, you save money because you save on gas to go get it yourself. Wink.
If you go for lunch together, he's paying duh. Ain't no girl gonna pay for a man's meal. I'm old school like that unless you're my "real husband" BUT if we're cool like that I maybe can pick up the check sometimes but don't be making a habit of it.
If you guys live in the same area, you can also benefit from some carpooling every now and then BUT If you have a jealous husband at home, forget it.
Jealous men abhor anything with a penis other than themselves and your work husband is no exception.
See another way to save at #10.
6. There is strong team work
If you are lucky to have your work spouse in the same department as you, your work life just got a little easier; assuming they are on the same IQ level as you, or higher. This way you can bounce ideas off each other, vet each other's work and offer that well needed thumbs up on a job well done.
Strong team work is displayed when you are placed on a project together. Some of which includes cool trips away from the boring office. Don't get any ideas now.
During team meetings you can enjoy making funny faces, use code language and laugh at the stupid stuff being said and done. It makes the time go by faster.
Best of all you are able to complete tasks faster as you know each other's schedule and work to make life easier for the other person.
These are things we should all do for the average coworker but being a work wife means your work husband does a little extra for you and vice versa. That's why its called perks duh.
As work wife, your work husband will work on the sidelines to protect you from haters. He will shield you from drama and report on anything negative that is being said about you. The partnership is like Bonnie and Clyde and you cover for each other when necessary.
7. Your personal life improves drastically
When you are a work wife, you are happier and this effect spills over into your personal life.
You become more tolerant and also nicer to be around. A big reason, that leads to this change at home, is that your "real life partner" becomes a little jealous. Like a peacock showing off his feathers, your "real husband" is going to do more to show you how great he is. When this happens you win. Smile.
You may find that your partner wants to be around you more at work events. This may result in your work husband becoming a little territorial but that's a good thing. Let them both fight to make you happy.
Happy wife, happy life.
If your real life partner is cheating, being a work wife (without sexual benefit) is a good move. This will keep them on their toes as they are busy watching you and will have less time to do wrong by you.
Wouldn't it be nice to catch hubby out on the town with some B, while you're at lunch with your work husband? Now that would make for some good TV drama.
8. It beats having a full blown affair
Platonic means little to no trouble in paradise.
9. You take way less sick days from work
Those 'no care days' are far and few as your work life is a more fulfilling experience. Enjoying the antics and made up stories with your work husband is just great. The pranks, jokes, innocent flirting and gimmicks add to the fun. All the more reason to go to work.
A joke a day keeps false illnesses at bay.
The boss might even notice the improvement in your attendance and take you off the black list. Looks like a win-win situation.
10. It costs less to communicate
Outside of talking face to face on the daily, you are blessed with CUG phones with unlimited talk time and phone extensions on fixed landlines. There is no meter running on your pocket because communication is technically free.
Nonverbal ques are also free commodity and very entertaining. Now it doesn't get any better than that.
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